Water Water Everywhere. . .

Okay, I am just getting up to speed on the water debacle. Let’s see if I got this straight:

1. Tucson Water tells everyone to conserve water, but now that we do, they find that this hamstrings them financially. So a 6% dip in water hookups and usage equals 15.4 million in lost revenues. The immediate answer would be to raise rates as a reward for conservation.

2. Was there never a plan for what would happen should water use decline? Were the commercials and hand wringing just a form of nagging that was never meant to be effective? Surely somebody somewhere had a plan for what might happen should water use actually fall, right?

3. Apparently not, if this gentleman is symbolic of the brain trust managing water in Tucson:

“Water is too cheap here,” said the planning commissioner, Sean Sullivan, an environmentalist who also sits on a commission overseeing a regional water study. “If you’re paying $20 to $30 a month on your water bill, you’re not looking to save water.”

OK brianiac, apparently the prices ARE enough to get people to conserve. I’m sure rewarding them with raising rates will make them proud of their efforts. I wonder what Mr. Sullivan’s paycheck totals per month. If we are looking to cut expenses. . .

4. So in order to make everything right, we are going to sell a good portion of our allotment of water from CAP.

To help bridge a $6.5 million budget hole for Tucson Water this fiscal year, the City Council voted unanimously Tuesday to sell more than one-third of its Central Arizona Project water share to pay it off.

The council also approved Tucson Water’s plan to sell 50,000 acre-feet of CAP water — enough to serve up to 150,000 households for a year — to the Arizona Water Banking Authority for next fiscal year as well. The fiscal year begins on July 1.

Tucson’s allocation of CAP water — which comes from the Colorado River — is just over 144,000 acre-feet a year. An acre-foot is about 324,000 gallons.

5. So we conserved enough water that we could sell it back and still probably not break even. Great! People in San Diego and Phoenix can water their lawns, and it will only cost us each a few extra dollars a month. Can’t go wrong with that deal.

The next time Traceoff and Uhlich start their sustainability riff, someone needs to introduce them to the business end of a water ballon.

Excuse me while I wash my car.